Entry tags:

fic: taming the weasleys, hermione/percy, lavender/charlie, rating: adult

Taming the Weasleys - 3/11 - Adult - Percy/Hermione, Charlie/Lavender
Title: Taming the Weasleys (3/11)
Author: silvernatasha
Rating: Adult
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Summary: Despite their mother's nagging, Charlie and Percy Weasley are perfectly happy being single and have no intention of settling down and getting married. The women in their lives, however, have other ideas.
Ships: Percy/Hermione, Charlie/Lavender, slight Charlie/Angelina, slight Fred/Angelina.
A/N: Written for midsummerfest and loosely based on Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew. View the dramatis personae here.
Word Count: 2026.

Chapter Three: In Which Charlie is the Centre of Attention

Parvati had never been much of a tea-drinker, but when Molly Weasley handed a cup rather forcefully to her, she just couldn’t say ‘no’. She smiled a little nervously, seeing a lot of similarities between Mrs Weasley and her own mother, who was very much the matriarch of the Patil family.

“So you work with Ron, then?”

Parvati nodded. “Yes. I write the female equivalent of Ron’s column.” A couple of years ago, some bright spark had decided that Witch Weekly’s readers would like an advice column from a male perspective. The first male columnist had been a complete disaster, Ron replacing him after only a couple of issues. At first, he had been a very surprising choice, primarily chosen because he was famous by association, but there was something undeniably male about Ron’s writing that appealed to the readers, even if he was dreadful with deadlines.

“I never thought my Ron would ever end up doing anything like he does.”

“Neither did I. At school he was never particularly… empathetic.” Admittedly, Parvati was a little bitter, as a recent poll had declared that Ron’s page was more popular than hers. She had a sneaking suspicion that this was due to the rather dashing photo that appeared at the top of the column, which winked and smiled at the camera. However, she was trying to move past that annoyance as she needed to get closer to Ron in order to find out more about his brother.

Molly offered her the biscuit tin and Parvati took one with a grin; she had a soft spot for biscuits, even if they didn’t quite agree with her diet. “Still, all my lot have gone into very different careers, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.”

Sipping her tea, Parvati saw an opportunity to broach the subject of Lavender’s mystery muscleman. “You know, I think I saw one of your older sons in Diagon Alley the other day. Redhead, obviously. He looked a bit older than Ron, but I don’t remember him from school.”

With a nod, Molly swallowed her mouthful of biscuit. “Well, Bill’s in France at the moment, so that was probably Charlie.”

Charlie. Right. So that was his name. Knowing his name was definitely a good start. “What does he do?”

“Oh, he works with dragons. He’s staying here at the moment. Actually, I’ve got three of my boys here at the moment. It’s not quite the same as when they were younger, but it’s so lovely to have Fred’s little boy around the place.” Molly eyed her carefully and Parvati felt a little uncomfortable, sure that she was being sized up as a potential girlfriend. That really wasn’t the purpose of her mission at all. She wished that Ron would hurry up - as soon as they arrived at The Burrow, Molly had sent her son out to de-gnome the garden, leaving Parvati alone as Molly bustled about putting the kettle on.

“I would introduce you to him, but he’s at work right now.”

Parvati raised her eyebrows. Lavender would definitely like the sound of someone who worked with dragons. Very manly. Rawr. “Really? Dragons? That sounds so interesting.”

“Dangerous, though,” Molly said with a motherly sigh. “Still, it’s nice to have him back in the country now.” Taking a seat, she added, “I think he’s a bit worried about his job, though. He wants to get a promotion, but he just doesn’t have the first aid skills.”

At this, Parvati’s jaw nearly dropped and it took her a couple of moments to compose herself. The hunk that Lavender had been drooling over for nearly the past week needed first aid training. Lavender needed to give training. This was working out exceptionally well and Parvati had to restrain herself from rubbing her hands together in glee.

Ron pushed open the back door. “Any tea left in the pot, Mum?” he asked hopefully, wiping his feet on the mat, the action ingrained on him after years of living at home.

“Yes. You can pour it yourself.”

Parvati fiddled a little nervously with one of her gold bracelets, trying to work up the courage to offer Lavender as a tutor. She watched as Ron helped himself to a couple of biscuits, munching on one as he poured himself a large mug of tea.

“You know,” she said slowly, setting down her cup, “I have a friend who’s a Mediwitch. If Charlie’s interested, I could ask her if she could help him.”

“What’s that about Charlie?” Ron asked, taking another biscuit.

Molly sniffed. “Your brother needs someone to help him with his first aid training.”

“Oh, yeah.” Ron rubbed his nose, leaning against the worktop. “Right.”

“Your friend probably has better things to do than help Charlie,” Molly said.

Parvati smiled. “Well, being a Mediwitch is all about helping people, isn’t it?” Inwardly, she was dancing in excitement. This was going better than she had ever hoped. “I’ll tell you what, why don’t I leave her Floo address? Then, Charlie can talk to her himself. I’m sure she won’t mind.”

Through a mouthful of biscuit, Ron asked, “Which friend?”

With an innocent look, Parvati said, “Lavender Brown.” She watched in some amusement as Ron grew visibly uncomfortable. His mother, however, didn’t notice this as she was rooting around in a drawer to find some parchment and a quill.

“Oh, right.”

Parvati beamed at him. Serves him right if he’s not happy with it. He broke Lavender’s heart.

“Why does that name sound familiar?” Molly asked.

Ron quickly cleared his throat. “Er, she… was at school with me. In my year.”

Paravti managed to hold back a giggle. She deeply wanted to tell Molly about Ron and Lavender’s relationship, but knew that she had to stay on good terms with all the Weasleys. “She was in Gryffindor with us.”

“Oh, that’s nice.”

“Yes,” Parvati agreed, flashing a sickly sweet smile at Ron. “It is.”

---

As Parvati’s face beamed up at her from the hearth, Lavender squealed, jumping up from where she had been crouching to talk to Parvati.

“Oh my god!”

“Are you okay?”

“Oh my god.” Lavender whimpered clutching at her skirt. “You really gave him my Floo address?” She wrung her hands fretfully, looking down at Parvati. She felt as though she needed to do something with her hands to stop herself getting too worked up about this development. This was all very exciting. All those muscles made sense seeing as he worked with dragons. Yum.

Parvati smiled. “Yes.”

“Oh my god.” Lavender took several deep breaths. calm down, calm down, calm down. “That means he’s actually going to talk to me. His head’s going to be in my fireplace. Where you are right now. Looking up at me.” She bit her lip.

“That’s generally what happens when you talk to someone over the Floo.”

Lavender’s eyes widened in realisation and she flapped her hands. “Oh my god. You know that this means? It means I’m going to have to be in full make-up all the time until he Floos me. I can’t have him seeing me without my make-up on! That’ll put him off me straight away.”

“You’re in full make-up all the time anyway.”

“That’s beside the point,” Lavender snapped. She started to quickly fan her face with her hands, sure that her cheeks were flushed. “Is it me or is it hot in here?”

Parvati scowled. “I have my head in the fireplace.” She paused for a moment, watching Lavender pace; she should have known that Lavender would get like this. “Do you want to talk to him or not?”

Lavender whimpered again. “I don’t know!” she exclaimed. Sighing, she ran a hand through her hair in exasperation. “He’s so gorgeous.” She knelt down in front of the fire, looking pleadingly at Parvati. “What do you think I should do?”

“I think you should shag him and get it over and done with. That’s what I think you should do.”

Pouting, Lavender said, “That’ll involve talking to him first. Maybe I should just stalk him instead. That could work.” She shrugged, trying to work out how she’d go about such a thing. I’d probably have to buy a camera or something. Do I have any stalking outfits? “At least I don’t have to worry about my magically-operated boyfriend falling for someone else.”

“You’re pathetic.”

“And horny.”

“I didn’t need to know that, Lavender.”

“Feel my pain!”

“I’d rather not, thanks.”

---

Charlie twisted the piece of parchment between his fingers. He looked at his mother. “How hard did you have to twist her arm before she gave you this, Mum?”

Molly brandished her wooden spoon at him. “Don’t take that tone with me, Charlie Weasley. You’re never too old for a good smack.”

He rolled his eyes, passing the red crayon to Fred’s little boy, who was quietly colouring at the kitchen table. He knew his mother would never follow through on that threat. Looking at the youngest member of the household, he couldn’t remember the twins being this quiet at his age, so he could only assume that the boy took after his mother in that respect. “You shouldn’t molest Ron’s friends, though, Mum. You’ll scare them off.”

Turning her attention back to her stew, Molly said, “For your information, Parvati was the one who volunteered her friend’s address. I had nothing to do with it.”

“You could have told her ‘no’.”

“But I know how much you want that promotion, Charlie. I just want what’s best for you.”

Charlie folded the parchment up, slipping it into the pocket of his jeans. “Fine. I’ll think about it. I suppose I don’t have to do anything with this.”

“You know,” Molly continued, “That Parvati’s a lovely girl. Maybe…”

He cut her off with a short, “No,” passing the yellow crayon to his nephew.

“I didn’t even finish what I was trying to say.”

“I know what you were trying to say. You were going to say that maybe Ron should introduce us. We might hit it off. We might even get married and have lots of little grandbabies for you to fuss over.”

This constant nagging about marriage was wearing down Charlie’s nerves and he couldn’t wait until January when his new place would be available. A place all of his own. His bachelor pad. It was going to be brilliant. No nagging. Nothing. He’d have to do his own laundry and cooking, but that was a small price to pay for freedom.

Molly sighed, leaving the spoon to stir the stew by itself. “Charlie you’re at the age where you should be settling down.” She looked fondly at her grandson. “Don’t you want a family? By the time I was your age, me and your father were already married with children.”

Charlie pulled a face. He pulled a piece of parchment towards him, starting to sketch out a picture of a dragon with a green crayon. The green wasn’t quite the right shade for a Common Welsh Green, but it would have to do. “Of course I want a family, Mum. Just not yet. I’m happy with my life as it is. Maybe one day I’ll find the right woman. At the moment, I don’t need some woman to hold me back.”

At this remark, Molly was sorely tempted to swat the back of Charlie’s hand with her spoon. “Well, if you’ve got that sort of attitude…”

“Don’t you want me to be happy, Mum?” Charlie bit back.

That was her Achilles’ heel. Her children’s happiness. Above everything else, she wanted them to be happy. She couldn’t quite believe that Charlie was happy with his life as it was when her family had brought her so much joy.

Watching him draw his dragon, his tongue just poking out between his lips, she smiled, seeing him as a small child again. Sometimes it was difficult not to see all of her children as they were when they were younger. Some things about them never changed, no matter how old they got.

“Time to put the toys away, boys. You need to set the table for dinner.”